What every Best Man Should know about the “Big Day”


So you have been asked to be the Best Man…now what?  As a counterpart to my previous post about being the Maid of Honor, I thought I would write about what a Best Man should know about his duties!

A Best Man is more than a glorified groomsman.  They are often a combination of a valet, hand-holder, and a calming agent for the groom during this nerve-racking time.


(Photo Credit:  Kristin Hornberger Photography)

The Best Man duties:

(According to The Knot,)

  • Serve as the groom’s personal aide and adviser before and during the wedding
  • Helping pack for the honeymoon (the valet part)
  • Help the groom and groomsman choose or rent (or buy) wedding formalwear
  • Arrange accommodations for out-of-town groomsmen.
  • Plan and organize the bachelor party
    • The cost should be split among everyone who attends the festivities
  • Attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner with the bride, groom, and all other attendants
    • Find out how to walk down the aisle – what order and with whom
  • Stand beside the groom at the alter and keep a hold of the bride’s ring
    • Safe place for the ring – in the inside pocket of your suit jacket
  • Keep track of the other groomsman and make sure they are doing all of their groomsman duties
  • Sign the marriage license as a witness after the ceremony, along with the maid of honor
  • Walk in with the maid of honor when the reception begins
  • Dance with both the maid of honor and bride during the wedding party dances
  • Give the first toast to the bride and groom at the reception.
  • Collect any gift envelopes guest bring to the reception
  • Decorate the getaway mobile – grab the wedding party for help!

download flower-decorated-wedding-car


The Toast

This is your biggest and probably most terrifying duty as Best Man. Check out these tips about giving the Best Man Speech according to Huffington Post:

KH-2731(Photo Credit:  Kristin Hornberger Photography)

  1. Be funny – Humor is the key to a successful speech
    • But not too funny! – Don’t let the speech be all about you – this is not a stand-up routine
  2. Be Sentimental – After you make them laugh, make them cry
  3. Don’t be intoxicated – no need for explanation for that one!
  4. Tell a Story – what are your favorite moments of the groom?  Any sweet stories of the bride and groom’s love story?
  5. Short and Sweet – Two-Three minutes is the low end; 10 at the high.  Spare your audience.
  6. Be Prepared – write your speech out or at least have detailed notes
    • But Not Too Prepared – Do not memorize or read word for word
  7. Relax – Take a deep breath and remember this is for your best friend
  8. Things Not To Talk About/Do – Do not talk about exes, crazy parties, or anything Grandma shouldn’t hear. Do notmess up names, swear, or fall
  9. Thank the Families – Thank both sets of families – tell them they did good good raising them
  10. Thank the Guests – especially the ones from out-of-town
  11. Mention the Bride – compliment her on her dress; remind him she’s way too good for him
  12. Raise a Toast – end naturally


Best Man Tips

I found on BuzzFeed, “17 Tips for Being a Better Best Man.”  Here are a few of my favorites-

Make a list of duties: Check out this Real Simple checklist for a comprehensive list.

Make sure your suit actually fits & the shoes match

Learn how to tie a bowtie (and regular tie) properly


Wear the best boutonniere ever! Like these:

basketball-hoop-grooms-boutonniere__teaser bouts-645x505 COOL BOUTONNIERES dde00ee629b59e22c7ba80610db5b2df

If you are booking hotel rooms for the bachelor party – try and score a free upgrade or group rate. Or, just use AirBnB or Homeaway to save everyone money

On the day of the wedding, come prepared


Don’t trust the ring bearer – you hang onto the rings (Give the ring bearer a knock off)

Just WALK down the aisle – do not moonwalk, do cart wheels, or dance down the aisle

Once the real party starts, have taxi service information on hand

Dance with the moms

Above all, stick to your groom

I found so much wonderful information about being the Best Man, all sorts of great tips and advice.  I believe overall just be there for the groom, be his right-hand, his side-kick, his best friend because after-all – that is why he picked you.

00163 groom_bestman_photoshoot groom-best-man_jacilyn-m The-groom-John-Taylor-and-his-best-man-Andy-Pemberton-enjoying-their-bromance

Until Next Time,



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